DECODING EMPLOYMENT ADS

Energetic self-starter: You'll be working on commission.

Entry level position: We will pay you the lowest wages allowed by law.

Experience required: We don't know jack about anything.

Fast learner: You will get no training from us.

Flexible work hours: You will frequently work long overtime hours.

Good organizational skills: You'll be handling the filing.

Make an investment in you future: This is a franchise or a pyramid scheme.

Management training position: You'll be everybody's flunkie.

Much client contact: You'll handle the phone or make "cold calls" on clients.

Must have reliable transportation: You will be required to break speed limits.

Opportunity of a lifetime: You will not find a lower salary for so much work.

Planning and coordination: You will be in charge of the bosses' travel arrangements.

Quick problem solver: You will be put on on projects that are months behind schedule.

Strong communication skills: You will write tons of documentation and letters.

(via Adlova)