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Sambhar Mafia - Cooked To Kill!

Wednesday, August 24, 2005

Love-cum-Arranged Marriage = Assisted Marriage

The international media’s soft corner for India continues as NYT reports on the new breed of “Assisted Marriages” in the US. I also tried my hand at naming Love Marriages and Arranged Marriages.

Arranged Marriage – Match fixing

Love Marriage – Resisted marriage / Registered Marriage

Less than a decade ago, the decision about whom a South Asian woman here might marry was often left to her parents, the prospective bride's preference for dentists or contemplative artists notwithstanding.

But purely arranged marriage has morphed into a new culture of what might be called "assisted" marriage.

Parents are now free to arrange all they like - allowing their sons and daughters choice among a roster of nominees screened for caste, lineage and geography, among other measures - and their children are free to veto those choices.

The purpose of assisted marriage here is not simply to preserve Indian cultural identity, but more pointedly to maintain class, religious and regional identities in a place where they might easily be diffused. When Mona Mahajan, a recent graduate of Harvard Business School from New Jersey, married an Indian she met on her own, she was the first in five generations of her family not to have married a Punjabi.

The embrace of more traditional habits is apparent in other ways. Many couples still consult a Hindu astrologer who schedules wedding ceremonies according to the stars. This autumn is expected to be an unusually busy wedding season in Indian communities because many couples postponed weddings last year when many days were deemed inauspicious.


  • interesting....marriages are one f the most interesting things around here..you might have heard it before..but the truth is here..it is not just two people marrying..it is two families marrying..and liked the definition of love marriage as resisted marriege!

    By Blogger monu, at 1:56 PM  

  • There are new forms of love and arranged marriage. One common form is you love, parents arrange the marriage. The other commonly used term is "lovingly arranged" marriage!!

    By Blogger Neelakantan, at 2:33 PM  

  • I see no difference between arranged marriage and trade....

    By Blogger Bala (Karthik), at 3:52 PM  

  • love marriages that are "arranged" - there was this nice post sometime back by Lavanya on same

    By Blogger Arvind, at 10:50 PM  

  • After all the married couples are going to interact with the other partners family and their own family.

    So its better if these families
    come to an understanding and most
    important thing..the couples should
    interact with each other before
    marriage to know better about the other.

    By Blogger Rajesh, at 12:55 AM  

  • whatever it might be as long as both partners and families are happy thats fine.
    But this is much better than blind dating that goes on here, that too online service where computer matches your interest,race, etc etc and hook up with someone wait wait thats sounds kind of arranged right but it is done by computer so must be advanced and sophisticated I guess

    By Blogger Ganesh, at 1:09 AM  

  • when i had told my american friend about the concept of arranged marriage, she gave me a look and told me - how can u do that. hmmm pretty interesting... ok ok. But i guess it all depends on the mindset. i think our customs are no more rigid as they were a decade back

    By Blogger Suguna Purushothaman, at 6:43 AM  

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